Breaking Dawn

I did it. I watched the whole Twilight Saga up till now while I was on my stationary bike this week. Not the last movie, of course, but I watched the first part of that later too. I had to. Every guy I meet tells me he saw the movies and I just got too curious for words. No one can make me read the books, but the films were accessible enough and I thought I could use exercise as an excuse. Why are so many guys attracted to it? I really wanted to know. I thought it was a pretty basic romance. Well, the truth has come to light. The whole thing is incredibly misogynistic. It’s disturbing. Not that I think all guys are misogynists and enjoy the film because of that. In my experience, though, a lot of guys I’ve known have appreciated violence and gore and they’re getting some of that in these films, which makes the romance easier to stomach.

My brother watched one of the movies a couple years back and came home in a mood, saying he couldn’t stand girls like Bella because they treat other people like crap while victimizing themselves. I’ve reached the same conclusion. Not only is this girl self-destructive, but she puts other people in danger all the time with absolutely no remorse, as if she’s entitled to the whole world sacrificing itself for her. This may be the reason Twilight has made such a powerful impact in our time. The overwhelming narcissism that’s now dictating the social norm is the perfect climate for Twilight‘s success, but what does that say about our state of affairs? We constantly criticize countries overseas for supposedly victimizing women and then we celebrate it in our societies with shows like Toddlers & Tiaras or whatever that shit is called and heroines like Bella. We encourage women to be ornate but empty, beautiful but tragic. We pretend that female self-destruction is artistic.

I recently checked out a few teen novels from the local public library to pass some time and they’re filled with the same kind of bullshit. Tragic, emotionally intense young girls with no interest in spiritual development or growth, who both hate and love destructively, and arbitrarily decide to live another day by the novels’ ends. Maybe the reason why so many girls go through some serious emotional trauma in their teens is because of the ridiculous ideas and images being forced on them by popular culture. I’m not even talking about images of models in magazines, I’m talking about the images and ideas of what a woman is supposed to be in popular culture. Conniving, emotionally manipulative, constantly telling people they’re strong but showing no evidence of self-discipline or restraint or generosity or skill or talent at anything other than making a scene and commanding attention, relying too heavily on being “loved” by men or told they’re “beautiful” in order to solidify their self-worth.

I’m not a feminist because I have little to no faith in -isms. I think they’re unnatural constructs. But I believe that strong women are equally as important as strong men in order to build healthy societies. I believe girls should be taught how to be fair, how to stand up for their beliefs, how to offer and accept emotional support without it leading to co-dependence, how to give generously and accept graciously without making demands, how to work hard for the things they want without expecting handouts, etc. I think girls should be taught how to be mature, responsible people that don’t claim to love someone without making sacrifices…because that’s essentially what loving is about. Feminism and chauvinism both ignore that. I don’t think there’s anything wrong, for example, with giving up a career to be a wife and a mother, if that’s what some women prefer doing. There’s no shame in that. There IS shame in having bad character and feeding off other people, physically and emotionally, like some kind of parasite. Modern feminism encourages women to develop some of the worst qualities associated with patriarchy in the past, just to be competitive in the marketplace, and yet it does not encourage women to compete with the best men in the past in terms of chastity, justice, truth, courage and courtesy.

I read this article today about Breaking Dawn and I have to say that I totally agree with it:

http://io9.com/5860947/in-twilight-breaking-dawn-bella-becomes-a-supernatural-version-of-octomom

One last point, as well, about female sexuality. I know it’s a controversial topic for teen girls. People don’t want to tell them to go out and have sex. If I ever had a daughter, I would definitely not want her to be a promiscuous person. At the same time, I don’t believe in demonizing sex acts while celebrating teen pregnancies. The message in a lot of teen novels is that sex is bad but “killing” a baby is worse. In my opinion, premarital sex is not as big a deal as giving birth before you’re emotionally prepared to. I don’t think teen girls should be encouraged to have babies just because they accidentally get pregnant or because they believe that it’s an expression of being in love. In my religion, abortion is frowned upon too, but I think in this case, two wrongs make a right. Mistreating a child because you don’t have the patience or skills to raise it is worse. Giving up your child to a stranger is worse. Maybe they will have a good life with them, true, but maybe they’ll be abused and mistreated and it’ll be your fault. You can’t possibly know its future. I wish the media would stop acting like giving birth when you get pregnant and you’re completely unprepared to is the only choice for a young girl to make. There are mad young mothers out there who neglect their children shamelessly in order to hold on to their social lives, smoke next to them, take them to nail salons, use their child tax credits to buy liquor or clothing for themselves, feed their children a steady diet of fast food, thrive on social assistance, etc. Not all of them, but I’ve seen many. I’ve even been told by a girl younger than me with three kids to “never have kids” (in front of her own children) because she regretted losing her freedom so much. Is that kind of life for kids less harmful than being aborted before they even become people?