What Is She DOING?!?!?

Don’t lie, I know you’re thinking it, lol. I’m not even sure I should tell you. Do you think you can handle it? Huh? Do you?

The truth is, I’m just being a jackass. If you’ve been keeping track, you’ve probably seen the site change and change and change back over the last couple of weeks. I was playing around with some new ideas, wanted to get a fresh look for 2012. It is, after all, the year that the world is supposed to end (FYI, I’m TOTALLY not buying that hocus pocus, real talk). But jokes aside, I DID want to shake things up and I MIGHT not be finished yet . We’ll see. That’s my new favorite thing to say.

Went kind of retro with the title. I know some of you might recognize that from, what, ’09? Something like that. I don’t remember when I changed it. That was definitely on purpose. I want to bring the focus back to the spiritual from the political. The political is just pissing me off beyond belief nowadays. Straight up, I’m sitting in an executive desk chair feeling nothing like a CEO. Because CEOs have money to make big changes and I barely have the money right now to dream of them. This fucking SOPA/PIPA thing really clinched it. I don’t support that legislation, obviously. I’ve said before that copyright violations are unfortunate when they deprive artists of money. At the same time, the entertainment industry has lost its fucking mind. Think about this, for example. Why pay $20 for a CD when it gets scratched in a year or two and can’t play anymore? If you don’t rip the CD and back it up, that means you’ll have to shell out more money to replace it. The entertainment industry wants us to replace that CD for the rest of our lives so it can profit. If that was my only option, I would find another CD to spend money on rather than buy the one that got damaged again because (drum roll), I already spent enough money on it! People just don’t have that much disposable income. There has to be a way to protect intellectual property without being a douche. And to be honest, this whole thing is more about American intellectual property rights than anyone else’s. The entire world is banding together to save the American economy from foreign competitors. Very touching. But this wasn’t supposed to be political, so I’ll cut it out.

I just wrote a short story about someone afraid of her own mortality and it got me thinking about my own. When I was younger, I was all about shaking up the system, but now it’s really hard to keep caring. Not in a “I’m just gonna enjoy the small comforts” kind of way, but in a “Let me just be as good as I can to the people I meet and write as much motivating shit as I can churn out” type of deal.  I’m starting to believe that small kindnesses can have a ripple effect and be just as healing for the world as angry revolutions. One isn’t always better than the other, of course. You need to see what’s appropriate for any given case. I just think we should balance out the two for optimal results. Ew. I sound like a scientist. Shame on me.

I’m going to bed now, because I have nothing more of value to contribute tonight. If you have the same taste in hip hop as me, watch this, it’s interesting:

Breaking Dawn

I did it. I watched the whole Twilight Saga up till now while I was on my stationary bike this week. Not the last movie, of course, but I watched the first part of that later too. I had to. Every guy I meet tells me he saw the movies and I just got too curious for words. No one can make me read the books, but the films were accessible enough and I thought I could use exercise as an excuse. Why are so many guys attracted to it? I really wanted to know. I thought it was a pretty basic romance. Well, the truth has come to light. The whole thing is incredibly misogynistic. It’s disturbing. Not that I think all guys are misogynists and enjoy the film because of that. In my experience, though, a lot of guys I’ve known have appreciated violence and gore and they’re getting some of that in these films, which makes the romance easier to stomach.

My brother watched one of the movies a couple years back and came home in a mood, saying he couldn’t stand girls like Bella because they treat other people like crap while victimizing themselves. I’ve reached the same conclusion. Not only is this girl self-destructive, but she puts other people in danger all the time with absolutely no remorse, as if she’s entitled to the whole world sacrificing itself for her. This may be the reason Twilight has made such a powerful impact in our time. The overwhelming narcissism that’s now dictating the social norm is the perfect climate for Twilight‘s success, but what does that say about our state of affairs? We constantly criticize countries overseas for supposedly victimizing women and then we celebrate it in our societies with shows like Toddlers & Tiaras or whatever that shit is called and heroines like Bella. We encourage women to be ornate but empty, beautiful but tragic. We pretend that female self-destruction is artistic.

I recently checked out a few teen novels from the local public library to pass some time and they’re filled with the same kind of bullshit. Tragic, emotionally intense young girls with no interest in spiritual development or growth, who both hate and love destructively, and arbitrarily decide to live another day by the novels’ ends. Maybe the reason why so many girls go through some serious emotional trauma in their teens is because of the ridiculous ideas and images being forced on them by popular culture. I’m not even talking about images of models in magazines, I’m talking about the images and ideas of what a woman is supposed to be in popular culture. Conniving, emotionally manipulative, constantly telling people they’re strong but showing no evidence of self-discipline or restraint or generosity or skill or talent at anything other than making a scene and commanding attention, relying too heavily on being “loved” by men or told they’re “beautiful” in order to solidify their self-worth.

I’m not a feminist because I have little to no faith in -isms. I think they’re unnatural constructs. But I believe that strong women are equally as important as strong men in order to build healthy societies. I believe girls should be taught how to be fair, how to stand up for their beliefs, how to offer and accept emotional support without it leading to co-dependence, how to give generously and accept graciously without making demands, how to work hard for the things they want without expecting handouts, etc. I think girls should be taught how to be mature, responsible people that don’t claim to love someone without making sacrifices…because that’s essentially what loving is about. Feminism and chauvinism both ignore that. I don’t think there’s anything wrong, for example, with giving up a career to be a wife and a mother, if that’s what some women prefer doing. There’s no shame in that. There IS shame in having bad character and feeding off other people, physically and emotionally, like some kind of parasite. Modern feminism encourages women to develop some of the worst qualities associated with patriarchy in the past, just to be competitive in the marketplace, and yet it does not encourage women to compete with the best men in the past in terms of chastity, justice, truth, courage and courtesy.

I read this article today about Breaking Dawn and I have to say that I totally agree with it:

http://io9.com/5860947/in-twilight-breaking-dawn-bella-becomes-a-supernatural-version-of-octomom

One last point, as well, about female sexuality. I know it’s a controversial topic for teen girls. People don’t want to tell them to go out and have sex. If I ever had a daughter, I would definitely not want her to be a promiscuous person. At the same time, I don’t believe in demonizing sex acts while celebrating teen pregnancies. The message in a lot of teen novels is that sex is bad but “killing” a baby is worse. In my opinion, premarital sex is not as big a deal as giving birth before you’re emotionally prepared to. I don’t think teen girls should be encouraged to have babies just because they accidentally get pregnant or because they believe that it’s an expression of being in love. In my religion, abortion is frowned upon too, but I think in this case, two wrongs make a right. Mistreating a child because you don’t have the patience or skills to raise it is worse. Giving up your child to a stranger is worse. Maybe they will have a good life with them, true, but maybe they’ll be abused and mistreated and it’ll be your fault. You can’t possibly know its future. I wish the media would stop acting like giving birth when you get pregnant and you’re completely unprepared to is the only choice for a young girl to make. There are mad young mothers out there who neglect their children shamelessly in order to hold on to their social lives, smoke next to them, take them to nail salons, use their child tax credits to buy liquor or clothing for themselves, feed their children a steady diet of fast food, thrive on social assistance, etc. Not all of them, but I’ve seen many. I’ve even been told by a girl younger than me with three kids to “never have kids” (in front of her own children) because she regretted losing her freedom so much. Is that kind of life for kids less harmful than being aborted before they even become people?

The Tax Man’s Coming…and He’s Coming for You.

For anyone who’s read John Donne’s Meditation 17, that might sound a little familiar. But don’t worry about that, we have bigger problems . I was at a Toyota dealership the other day, getting my car serviced. While I was in the waiting room, I saw something scary on TV and had to look it up when I got home. Brace yourselves for this now: Canadian workers are going to be paying more taxes in 2012.

http://www.thestar.com/news/canada/politics/article/1107876–expect-higher-payroll-taxes-in-2012-taxpayers-group-says

It’s mostly due to increases in EI premiums. While the government claims that personal income taxes haven’t been increased, the Canadian Taxpayers’ Federation maintains that we will actually see them rise anyway because the provincial rate of inflation is higher than the rate used to calculate the federal income tax brackets. I don’t exactly know what that means mathematically, but I’m positive it means we’re all screwed. The corporate tax rate has gone down, of course.

I, for one, have switched over from body wash to bars of soap and have started buying $20 jeans. No compromise for me on health food and moisturizing lotions, but if I have to live like a hippy when it comes to clothing and entertainment just to make budget, well then, I know what I have to do .

We’ve all been promised a few tax credits, of course, to make up for it all. But tax credits are kind of like gift cards. They usually fall short of what you would need to spend to get what you want, they’re non-refundable and non-transferable, and they force you to shop places you don’t always like for things you don’t always need. It’s usually parents with families or dependents that qualify for tax credits and while I realize it’s hard being a parent and you need all the help you can get, it’s also scary being single and living on a low income that’s overtaxed to help out people that don’t even fit into the same category as you. And while I’m on that, I think EI is great and necessary in terms of offering a helping hand. What I don’t like about having to spend more on it is when the government uses EI contributions to fund social programs that are inaccessible to the majority of Canadians (like that 246-million in EI funds dedicated to special benefits for fisheries: http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/national/tax-man-to-hit-canadian-workers-harder-in-2011/article1851480/). I’m all for helping out unemployed fellow citizens with tax dollars, but I have a hard time believing that’s all that’s happening here.

Why am I not completely enraged? Good question. This does seem like the kind of thing that would normally piss me off. Here’s why: I have completely stopped believing in the system over the last few years. I don’t think Canada is the worst place to live, far from it. I believe there are opportunities here that don’t exist elsewhere in the world…for now. But I have no intention of being a wage slave. That is what the grossly wealthy (including many who are higher up in the government) want us to be so that they can continue to profit off of us. I’m not going to help make that dream come true for them. That’s why I don’t own an iPhone or max out my credit cards going on trips to the Caribbean or blow money on concerts and clubbing anymore. You shouldn’t have to sacrifice your life just to pay for one. There’s gotta be another way. And when I find out what it is, I’ll let you know.

It’s New Year’s Eve, by the way. Here’s wishing everyone out there a happy, safe holiday. Not that I know anyone who’s ever claimed to have had a really “happy” New Year’s. But there’s a first time for everything, right? And with public transportation doing free rides, if you end up driving home drunk tonight anyway, I honestly hope you do get busted and fined and that it doesn’t involve taking someone’s life. Not convinced that it’s a big deal? According to this article, impaired driving is the leading cause of criminal death in Canada:

http://haliburtonhighlander.ca/2011/12/27/drunken-driving-still-the-leading-cause-of-criminal-death-in-canada/

And for people that post up RIDE checkpoints on Twitter and shit, let’s hope you don’t help someone run you down on your way home. Because that would be really ironic. I watched a Closer episode about something like that. A daughter helped her mother avoid a drunk driving checkpoint and her mom ended up killing a girl her age on a scooter.

Knowing vs. Seeing

This is a creepy track, yes, but it’s interesting. The first two verses draw you a visual picture of a suicidal girl, the last gives you mental insight into her undoing. Planetary and Doap Nixon do a good job on the setup, but Apathy kills it with the last verse, telling you what a girl’s thinking rather than just wondering about her circumstances. You get left with the feeling that knowing why something happens is so unbelievably beyond just seeing it happen. And it’s only through knowing what someone’s feeling that you can reach out to them and offer some assistance. Apathy actually does a pretty good job putting into words what some victims have a hard time expressing. He must’ve either known this feeling himself at one point or at least known someone who communicated this. I’ve heard similar things from girls. A friend of mine used to like a girl who not only cut herself but cut her boyfriend too during intercourse. She said it was the only way they could get off :S :

Where is this coming from, you ask? Don’t worry about me, lol. I just read an article about a girl who posted to Twitter 144 times or so in the six hours before she killed herself and none of her 500 + “followers”, including her best friend, did anything to stop her. She claimed she’d been abused by family and sexually exploited from time, even went to the police, but they never did anything due to a lack of evidence. I think she was around 18. This, of course, happened in the States. Some people are suggesting that maybe, if the police refused to act, she was making false accusations. I think it’s not likely she would’ve gone through with suicide over some lies. But even if that were the case, she obviously needed someone to talk to and some help above everything else. It’s really unfortunate that she felt like she had no one to turn to and it bothers me that so many people have such faith in social media as a tool to bring people together when in fact it’s having the opposite effect in so many situations.

Dirty South

I was watching The Closer today and remembered something I read in Gone With the Wind once: when Rhett tells Scarlett how he escaped being hanged for murder by employing some blackmail. “Influence is everything, and guilt or innocence merely an academic question,” he claims. I feel like the only reason some people are still walking around free is not that they are more intelligent than other people and can’t get caught for their transgressions, but maybe they’re looser lipped than we all think. Or provide some kind of service to the authorities in exchange for their freedom. I don’t know. But it’s shady.

A lot of people hate Gone With the Wind for being a racist book. It IS racist, but there are still words of wisdom hidden at random in its hundreds of pages. If you write that excessively, you’re bound to say something genius at least once–even if it’s by accident.

I have plans to go back to school either this coming fall or next winter. I can hear you going: yeah, right. Bear with me. I know people think I’m immature because of the way I live my life. I get told to grow up all the time. And a guy who’s never had a legal job in his life once made fun of ME for not having a “real job”! Here’s the reason why I’m being so difficult: I’m afraid of giving up any individuality I have and completely conforming to an alien work environment just for the sake of being paid. Is that not a type of slavery? And is it any wonder then that I try to protect myself from such a fate? I’m just afraid of never being able to have an opinion again. I got fired from one job in my field because I expressed some views publicly that embarrassed my employers. With corporate jobs, it’s like you run the risk of becoming bland, flat and stale to fit in…but profitable. I’d rather work retail for the rest of my life, make less money and be able to write controversial (but important) shit than work for a company that wants to own me body, brain and soul, and keeps me afraid of being creative in ways that don’t benefit it just for a few “perks” and a higher wage. I’m not calling people “sell outs” or anything for being a part of the corporate world. That’s where you SHOULD be if the work is stuff you like or at least stuff you can see yourself doing even if you’re not in love with it. I am just worried I don’t feel that way. But whatever. I’m giving school one last try . If I don’t get into the program I applied to or I don’t make it in the field, then there’s my direction.

People like this are blessed. They can say what’s on their minds and still make a living:

Oh, and while I’m on the subject of music, I can’t help laughing at one thing. I don’t know if you remember this song, but it came out when I was still at UofT. I used to be friends with this guy who kinda wanted to be more. Whenever we were in a car together, this song would be playing on the radio. It was one of those top 10 songs that got played over and over by a few radio stations that summer. “This is, like, our song, man,” he used to tell me, excited. It was not “our” song, it was “my” song. It was stuff I would’ve serenaded him with if I knew how to play a cool instrument and had a better singing voice, lol. Poor dude. But I don’t feel too bad for him. He’s doing fine without me . Everything has worked out in the best way. Jo be hota hai, vo acha hota hai. Or something like that.

Still recovering from the last couple days. Been completely out of sorts. Head’s still killing, but chills have stopped, thank God…

Savin’ Me

I know I’m supposed to be some big hip hop head, so we gotta keep this between us, aight? Shhh. Lol. Naw, for real, though, I grew up on alternative rock and punk rock. Not really the indie stuff, mostly mainstream. I didn’t start getting into hip hop till I hit 19/20. Bet you didn’t know that about me, huh? . I act like a fanatic about it.

I’m actually confessing this because I saw an interview on The Hour just now with Nickelback. I used to like them back in the day. Funny story. This one girl sent me a message online with a weird abstract thing going on a long time ago. She instructed me to stare at it for a while (I forget how long), then to look at a blank wall immediately after. “Who do you see coming through the wall?” She asked me, still online. “It’s the guy from Nickelback!” I answered, all excited. Turns out, it was supposed to be Jesus. Oh, well. Shit happens.

Here’s one track I was really into. It came out when I was 23. I haven’t heard anything of theirs that’s newer, but all the best to them:

Occupied

Let me just say that while I understand and respect some of the sentiments behind the Occupy Wall Street movement, I don’t really get Occupy Toronto. Lately, every news story I’ve read about it just speculates how much longer the protests will last or whether or not the dissenters will be evicted. But “you can’t evict an idea,” one young protester affirmed into a CP24 microphone the other day. I’m still unclear, however, about what ideas Occupy Toronto represents.

Oh, I know it’s against greed and corruption and bad things in general. I don’t think that’s enough, though. For the movement to work, they have to be asking for something in particular, even if it’s just one policy amendment. You can’t just protest bad stuff and expect government to listen. Aren’t some of these people supposed to be professional activists? They should know the drill.

Personally, I don’t believe protesting is the way to a better life for all. But there are two circumstances where I think it can (kind of) work. Don’t get me wrong. I think people could do a better job changing the way this country is run if they learn how to do it bureaucratically instead of through mobilization. If you HAVE to mobilize, however, there are only two ways to be taken seriously. The first is to strike fear into the hearts of politicians. The second is to annoy them so completely that they have no choice but to listen. Either way, you have to have a concrete list of specific demands that you can negotiate, otherwise the protest doesn’t stand a chance. To use fear or frustration to your advantage, you also need way, way more people involved and the protests can’t be civilized or they will fail. If politicians don’t fear protesters, protesters will not see their demands met. It’s unfortunate, but true. At the same time, consider this: the money that’s spent by the city to clean up after you and sic security on you is coming out of people’s taxes and that will end up justifying cuts to the budget and maybe even subsequent job losses. Are you really helping the 99%? Really?

I think people should focus on raising money and building awareness to support people who actually care about Canada and Canadians and want to run for office with the intention of rearranging the way that government works to pass legislation and even elect representatives. The whole point of building a democracy is to be democratic, after all. There has to be another way to change the rules besides living in a tent and chanting slogans. Get a lawyer, file a human rights lawsuit on behalf of the 99%. The Supreme Court of Canada makes all kinds of crazy decisions. We have a pretty good shot at winning.

Just do something real for once, please, and stop wasting everyone’s time and money.

And don’t even get me started about the connotations associated with the word “occupied” in our day and age. I can’t detach it from the idea of a militant, oppressive tactic. Occupying a place is not making it better, it’s just being there and causing mayhem. Why is it “Occupy Toronto”? Probably because the protests will accomplish little more than that. If you really wanna liberate people, it seems like an odd name for that kind of movement.

Bullied to Death

Okay, I’m gonna sound like a jackass for a second, but bear with me. You guys always have before and I appreciate it. So here goes:

This national and international bullying awareness that’s going on is absolutely unbelievable. Bullying is not a new thing. I don’t know why it’s being treated like some crazy recent development. The only thing that’s probably unprecedented about the modern bullying that’s taking place is that kids are committing suicide as a result of it. It would alarm me a great deal more if bullies were actually killing people. That WOULD be a cause for concern. How are children committing suicide over other children not liking them? SUICIDE?! CHILDREN!!! I didn’t even know what suicide was when I was 11. What the fuck is going on here? Is that not a bigger problem? Young people are ending their lives because people are sending them hateful text messages? How are they being raised that their self worth is so fragile?

When I was in school, I had girls threaten to beat me up for no fucking reason. None of them followed through on any of it. I don’t even know why. Partly, I think it’s important not to act like a wimp and people won’t treat you like one. And if people don’t like you, try being nice to them once in a while when they really need it. I helped this one girl with her essay once in grade 11 and when some guy called me names and used to try to unzip my jacket just to annoy me, she told him off pretty badly one time and he never came near me after. I helped a guy in shop with a wood carving he was making and when another guy whipped balls of paper at me, the dude I helped picked them all up and whipped them back at that asshole and he stopped. Helping people out and making allies is key to keep bullies at bay. They often pick on people who they think are weak and easily disturbed. MAKE FRIENDS!!! Even if they’re just superficial ones. That’s what parents should be teaching their kids about bullying. MAKE FRIENDS!!! And try to befriend a bully too. My brother did it in elementary school after my mom read him a Care Bears book called Ben’s New Buddy where dude tried to make friends with a guy who was harassing him. Bullying is an old problem. The solution to it is not that complicated. Millions of children in the past have dealt with it and still live to tell the tale.

Secondly, people need to develop thicker skins. Kids back in the day were nowhere near as sensitive as kids today. Parents nowadays seem to be raising their children in little narcissistic bubbles or something that get rudely penetrated when they start going to school. Seriously, man up, people. When you get out into the world as an adult, you will hear a lot more criticism than praise. People will try to get you fired from your job out of competitiveness or plain pettiness. Guys or girls will reject you with very little class. If you can’t handle a few kids making fun of you when the stakes are so low, what are you gonna turn into later in life? Stop being marshmallows. Get out there, develop some self-esteem and live your life.

Cyber-bullying and bullying over text messages is something completely weird to me. It’s hard for me to even imagine feeling threatened over any of that. People say a lot of shit over electronic mediums that they don’t have the courage to say in real life. Just look at YouTube comments. People threaten each others’ lives over who likes what artist better or how someone spelled something. There is so much offensiveness online, it’s hard to get offended by anything anymore. So don’t.

Some other advice for parents is to put their kids into some kind of athletic activity that’s affordable and will teach them self-confidence, discipline and improve their body image. Maybe they’ll make a few friends outside of school that will help them with their social skills.

And for those people whose children are actually picking on other kids? I can guarantee you’re doing something to enable them. My mom’s been working with young children for years. More often than not, the children who’ve had serious problems getting along with other kids are children who are spoiled and more often than not the sole child of over-indulgent parents. One of the most violent kids my mother ever came across had a mother on depression medication that flipped out over little things, got angry when my mother mentioned to her when her son hurt another child, and refused to talk to him about respecting other people and their property, instead accusing my mom of having a vendetta against her child. His parents never disciplined him except for when he broke something and they had to pay to replace it. And he was always telling my mom that his mom and dad were going to beat her up whenever she gave him a time out for pulling someone’s hair or scratching their faces. It wouldn’t surprise me at all if he’s started bullying other kids now that he’s going to school. Before high school, aggression against other kids can absolutely be traced back to children who get their way at home all the time and are not disciplined for violent behaviour.

But the bottom line is, you can’t control other children or their parents with policies or seminars. You can only control yourself and how you prepare for or react to any given situation. Stop teaching children to blame other people for their problems and encourage them to control how they behave in response to aggression. Life only gets harder the older you get and if children can’t even survive the system at its most elementary level, their futures are in serious jeopardy.

That Time of the Month

I totally missed posting on my birthday. Sucks because it was my last birthday in my 20′s and I failed to capture the evidence. But whatever. Shit happens, right? Didn’t meet my story deadline either, but I’m almost there…and if I focus for the next week and a half, I can meet my extended deadline, so all is not lost, lol.

Been watching RSAnimate videos to inspire myself. The story I’m writing has something to do with the pursuit of wealth. Don’t want to get into detail on here, but I’ve been reading different things to try and get a handle on some of my own philosophies about money, happiness and love. Found this very interesting:

Unfair Use

I’m sick of Apple…and I’m typing this on a MacBook, lol. But honestly, how much money do people think the average consumer has to spend? Tell me, what’s the point of purchasing movies from iTunes when you can’t burn a DVD copy of it to watch on an actual TV? That’s taking copyright way, way too far. I understand how piracy hurts the film industry and makes it harder for artists to produce quality work, but it is NOT fair to have to pay for multiple copies of one thing and then replace those copies when they crap out (which they always do), especially with the rising costs of…well…everything nowadays.

Now, I know what you’re thinking: what the fuck convinced me that buying an iTunes movie would be a good idea? Trust me, I wasn’t born yesterday. I know that when you’re paying for something online, you’re probably paying more than you think (in more ways than one). I was at the forefront of all the skeptics when people started finding all kinds of cool free shit on the Internet. I kept telling everyone, “It’s free now, but watch out. One day, when we least expect it, we won’t be able to type a word without incurring costs.” Too paranoid, that was me. But my Dad’s birthday is tomorrow (shh, I know, I know, last minute) and I wanted to get him a copy of a tele-film called Slackistan. I rented it from iTunes a while ago and thought it was really good. There was no way to buy the film anywhere. It hasn’t been released on DVD yet and it might never be because it’s an indie film and it would have to be picked up by a distributor for that to happen. There is also a bit of sociopolitical controversy associated with certain aspects of the film that might delay its consumer release. That being the case, buying it on iTunes was the only way to buy it in Canada that I could see. If I had wanted to download a torrent of it, I couldn’t have done that. It’s too new and rare. Any torrents out there for it are most likely fake. And to be honest, I wanted to actually buy a copy of the movie, regardless of the cost. I totally support good, independent films and would like to see talented directors and actors succeed. But now that iTunes .m4v is sitting on my hard drive and I can’t do anything with it except watch it in iTunes on my specific computer! I tried changing the file extension to .mp4, but that didn’t help. I can watch it in Quicktime, but I still can’t burn it onto DVD because of something called DRM that “protects” the file from people like me. In other words, working class people that don’t have money to spend on Apple TV and other junk that will empty out their pockets just to make it somewhat easier for them to watch a film as a family.

Technology is sending the message loud and clear, my friends. You are alone in this world and if you can’t afford not to be, you’re gonna stay that way.

P.S. DRM removal programs are a waste of money and time. They do not work. Do some research if you want. There are companies out there that are tied up in lawsuits as we speak for claiming to be able to remove DRM protection from music and videos. So far, the only fix is for DRM-protected music and supposedly Apple endorses that itself, knowing that nobody would ever, ever buy another .mp3 if they didn’t stop and throw the public a bone. Free, “illegal” .mp3s are too tempting. Removing DRM from music can be done by outwitting iMovie or even by playing some games in iTunes, I believe…

P.P.S. The only short-term solution I can see is to turn on home-sharing in iTunes and watch it on a computer hooked up to the TV. Big, big hassle (especially if you then need to go out and get appropriate cables for it), but that’s the only way I can see so far to deal with the situation.

P.P.P.S. I’m never buying an iTunes movie again.

Taking Flight

Wish I was the owner of this place, lol:

It’s absolutely beautiful.

Can’t believe the summer is going by so fast. Didn’t even get to enjoy the outdoors so far. I went to an outdoor concert on Canada Day and that was pretty much it. That shit was pretty interesting, though. In celebration of Pickering’s 200th birthday (which happened to coincide with Canada Day), the City of Pickering got Kardinall on stage, Alyssa Reid and Danny Fernandes. The fireworks at the end were spectacular. I wish I had taken my camcorder with me . Oh, well. There’s always next year…

Where Wuz Heaven

I’ve been trying to write at night for the past couple of days and am making some progress on a story I’ve been working on. It’s entirely different from everything I’ve attempted before, so I’m hoping any reaction to it will be more favorable as well. Of course, in order to write anything worthwhile, I gotta have my soundtrack playing in the background. Discovered this track the other day and fell in love with it. It’s not even so much what he says, but how he delivers it:

I used to know a guy a couple years ago who introduced me to Wu-Syndicate. He gave me their first album and told me I should listen to it. I kept putting it off to make time for other shit and then ended up returning the CD without giving it a real chance. I remembered it the other day while I was listening to some Killarmy and Dom Pachino (he introduced me to those guys too). Decided to look for a copy for myself. Wanted to see what it was all about. I’m shaking my head at myself now, lol. That CD is very hard to get. Wu-Syndicate records are selling for, like, $200 if they’re in mint condition. They’re collectors’ items now! I have a couple tricks up my sleeve, though, so hopefully I can find an affordable copy for myself. Should’ve taken advantage back in the day. Buddy really knew music.

Return of the Mack

By “mack,” I mean me, lol. I’ve been missing for a while, huh? I was just trying to get some work done…and I was having some second thoughts about the blog. Sometimes I write things I want to take back, but I hate the idea of constant self-editing. I thought maybe I should let it go. But today, I decided I’d rather not. I get excited about music or something I read and I really want to share it…even if I change my mind about it later. I especially want everyone to know (if you’re still out there), that I have very strong opinions about a few things in life. Some will never change, I hope, but others most certainly will. I’m not dead yet. I’m still learning. If I seem a little cynical about things like systemic racism and the oppression of the working class, that doesn’t mean that I can’t entertain opposing ideas.

That being said, this post is almost useless. Very little progress has been made on anything since I saw you last. I’m still working on getting published . Don’t judge — it’s not easy. I’m still looking for a next job. There’s a long way to go, lol. But I heard a track today that really hit me and the struggle doesn’t seem so hard when you have God and good music:

P.S. The Game concert never happened as per usual. He got arrested and detained at the border and then they sent him back to the States. His whole Canadian tour went to shit. When will we all learn? If Substance Group ever puts “Game” on their flyers, you know it’s gonna be a disaster.

The Show Must Go On

Cuz if it doesn’t, I’m gonna lose it, lol. I’m talking about the Game. He’s coming down the weekend of the 23rd. I have tickets to it. But I’ve done this before. Last time was in 2007. It got postponed twice and then cancelled. Substance Group does not have a great track record for getting him across the border. I’m trying to rent a hotel this time too, but it’ll suck if the concert gets cancelled and I still have the room. Whatever. I’ll just take my lover down there. We’ll figure out what to do with it;)…if I HAVE a lover by the 23rd…Don’t laugh. A lot could happen in three weeks.

Didn’t think I could afford to get a room but I’m getting a check from Bell for over $100. I totally overpaid my Blackberry bill before I transferred it off to my mom, so they’re sending me the difference. Feels like free money, but it shouldn’t cuz it’s technically mine…

Dirty Jokes

I don’t really make them cuz I’m not good at them, but sometimes it happens by accident. The only thing to do in that case is force yourself to laugh and hope that you can get the people around you to laugh with you.

Yesterday, this dude came into the store. Cute, Filipino, shops like he’s on speed. He managed to find a few things and came up to the counter to pay for them. Pulled out his debit card. It had a chip on it, so I instructed him, as usual, to insert it into the chip reader on the debit machine. He did, but the machine wouldn’t read it, so he pulled it back out and tried swiping it at the top. That didn’t work either. “No, no, no,” I told him. “You have to use the chip reader for that.” Dude looks at me wide-eyed and says, “I did! It’s not working.” So I lean over at the point, take the debit card from his hand and put it into the chip reader myself and…what do you know? It works. But I couldn’t just leave it at that. I had to say something stupid. “See, sometimes,” I began, in a confidential voice (still leaning over the counter!), “people are scared to put it all the way in.” I smiled at him, then pulled back and started putting his stuff in a bag. It took me two seconds to realize what exactly I just said to him. My brain started laughing at me. He had a serious face when I looked back at him, so I thought to myself that maybe he didn’t get it. I should just pretend like nothing was out of the ordinary. But then all of a sudden, when I handed him his stuff, he’s like, “You know there’s a lot of dirty shit I could have said just now and I didn’t.”

I actually did laugh then. “I know,” I replied. “Thanks.” I should stick to political rants, shouldn’t I? That being said, there are too many dirty jokes that can be made off of debit machines. My favorite one was when I was working at a restaurant a couple years ago and we had hand held machines that we brought to the table. The machine would print off both merchant and customer receipts really fast and a lot of the times they would come out as one receipt if you didn’t stay on top of things and rip the first one off as soon as it finished printing. This one dude watches me do that and he comments on it. He’s like, “Oh, that stuff comes up pretty fast. How do you keep the first receipt from printing with the second receipt?” Me: “I have to rip it really fast before it comes up.” He nods and says, “Yeah, that’s what it was like with my first girlfriend.” LOL.

I filmed a tribute to the store, but I wasn’t happy with it, so I’m gonna redo it tomorrow. The problem is, I came down with yet another cold and it’s been hard to focus on anything lately. I never used to get sick. I can’t believe I’ve gotten sick so many times this winter. I really think it’s the amount of hours I’ve been working.